billy jonas / bridging divides

Once upon a time
I was on the brink
I was so thirsty
I could hardly think
I ordered a lemonade or two or three or four and then I ordered one more  for the road
They said, "that's one too many."

So I ran
A wanted man
With my lemonade
ONE TOO MANY

To a snazzy little jazz café where they really blew the blues
I used to be a playa so I'd come to pay my dues
I asked them for a solo
They would not give me any
So I grabbed a trumpet TOOT
They said, "that's one toot too many.'

So I ran
A wanted man
With my lemonade
ONE TOO MANY
Trumpet
ONE TOOT TOO MANY

To a theatre  
For a tutu  
To wear as a disguise  
I found several
And they all seemed to fit
To my surprise
I managed to squeeze twenty-two tutus 'round my fanny when the manager burst in and said, "that's one  tutu too many."

So I ran
A wanted man  
With my lemonade
ONE TOO MANY
Trumpet
ONE TOOT TOO MANY
Tutus
ONE TUTU TOO MANY

To a tattoo parlor 'cause all this stuff was hot  
I said, "can you tattoo a two on to everything I've got?"
He did the lemonade, the trumpet, and twenty-one tutus  
plenty
But the twenty-second tutu there was "one tutu tattoo too many."

So I ran
A wanted man
With my lemonade
ONE TOO MANY
Trumpet
ONE TOOT TOO MANY
Tutus
ONE TUTU TOO MANY
Tattoos
ONE TUTU TATTOO TOO MANY

To a Transylvanian boxing match
To try the ol' 'one-two'
I jumped into the ring
He hit me
One-two-two-two-two-two
I said "I vant to von-two-two-two too"
" you vant to whvat?"
"I vant to von-two-two-two-two-two too
he said, "that's von vant to two-two-two-two . . . two too many."

So I ran
A wanted man
With my lemonade
ONE TOO MANY
Trumpet
ONE TOOT TOO MANY
Tutus
ONE TUTU TOO MANY
Tattoos
ONE TUTU TATTOO TOO MANY
Boxing match
ONE VANT TO VON-TWO-TWO-TWO-TWO . . . TWO TOO MANY!

Words and Lyrics by Billy Jonas and Laura Mahr
Copyright 2009 Billy Jonas, Bang-A-Bucket Music, BMI; Laura Mahr

Billy Jonas: vocals, guitar
Jake Wolf: bass
Chris Rosser: harpsichord, organ
Ric Hordinski: electric guitars
Matt Smith: Pedal Steel




Produced by Billy Jonas, Bill Melanson & Adam Johnson
Engineered by Adam Johnson at Possum Palace, Ric Hordinski at the monastary
Mixed by Billy Jonas and Adam Johnson at Possum Palace, Braidstream Studios and Upstream Studios, Asheville, NC